1,101 One-Liners

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Subjects include:
Age, Airlines, Apartments, Babies, Banks, Beef, Cars, Cats, Childhood, Children, Church, Cooking, Crime, Dating, Dentists, Doctors, Dogs, Driving, Economy, Energy, Exercise, Fashion, Fat, Food Prices, Guns, Health, Home, Hunting, Husband, Jogging, Lawn and Garden, Luck, Marriage, Cash, Movies, Proverbs, Religion, Restaurants, School, Smoking, Streets, Taxes, Teenagers, Television, Wife and plenty more.

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Several Sample Lines from
1,101 One-Liners

Abortion
Studies show that 100 percent of those who advocate abortion are individuals who already have been born.

Advice
She can offer plenty of advice. Great advice. Advice that is been passed down from generation to generation and never been used.

Ballet
He went to a ballet once. He did not like it. He could not even tell who won.

Barbecue
Why is it lighting an outdoor grill always makes the wind blow?

Candy
Have you at one time wondered why no different candy bar that rots a child's teeth is a wonderful source of quick energy for adults?

Childhood
I'd a terrible childhood. I am most likely the just guy in history who was once bitten by the Tooth Fairy.

Cooking
If it's moral, my wife's done it to a chicken.

Handy
He is most likely the just guy in town who ever got his finger caught in a screwdriver.

Luck
She called the gas company one Friday afternoon -- they kept her on "Hold" all weekend.

Movies
Why ought to I pay $9.00 for a movie ticket when I'm able to see no different movie on TV for $40.00 a few weeks?

Religious
He always listens to his conscience -- that still small inner voice that warns him when somebody's watching.

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